Colin vs Cuthbert - Who Would Win the Role?

If you’ve not heard about the Colin vs Cuthbert scandal then you must have been living in a cocoon. This is the story of supermarket M&S launching a lawsuit against rival supermarket Aldi for copyright infringement of their Colin the Caterpillar chocolate cake. The memes, TikTok videos and parodies that followed gripped the nation. But let’s be honest, there isn’t much else to do just now. In the name of staying hip and cool we thought we better try shoe-horn it into what we’re up to too. Trends are made to be followed and we’ll be damned if we’re ever considered not-trendy. So without further ado we present to you… Who would win the role from a client, recruitment agency Colin or recruitment agency Cuthbert? 

Colin tells the client he’ll find them the perfect candidate because he’s been around for ages, has a solid reputation, uses tried and tested, traditional methods and has built up excellent relationships with top talent in the industry over decades on the shelf, er in the job. Client is impressed.

Cuthbert, a newer caterpillar on the block but with equally impressive standing in the market, explains how he can not only get them a top candidate, but can also save the client time and money as he is armed with the UK’s leading digital recruitment tech. He is going to use it to engage the best talent and then will complete the first stage interviews himself on video, ruling out those who aren’t a fit before sending them over on a digital shortlist. Ooo, fancy! 

Colin- 0, Cuthbert- 1. 

Colin tells the client that video is all well and good but don’t you think you need to see the person face-to-face to really get to know them? And aren’t we sick of looking at screens after a year of lockdown? 

Cuthbert says that actually he was using video before the pandemic to save his clients time and there’s more to it than just video calling. Cuthbert can send his client a digital shortlist showing the top clients, their first stage interviews and supporting documents all in one place. Cuthbert can even show the client how popular the candidates are with other potential employers! He also asserts that video isn’t about replacing face-to-face interviews, nobody is arguing for that. Simply that it speeds things up for everyone involved, candidates included.

Colin- Coronavirus, Cuthbert- 2

Colin says yeah yeah whatever but I won’t make you pay me exclusively for the role. I’ll be working 10 other jobs to make sure if young Cuthbert does beat me to post I’ll still be meeting my targets and getting paid sweet money from someone else. 

Cuthbert says yes I would rather work the role exclusively as I will be adding lots more value, and I’m very confident I will find you the perfect candidate. I have a BD tool that helps me engage with more of the best talent too. I’m not charging you extra, I would just like some commitment from you as I want to be able to dedicate my time to it accordingly. 

Colin- 0, Cuthbert- 3 

Be more like Cuthbert. Do quality work for your clients and you’ll see a quality paycheck to match. 

For legal reasons, this is a joke. We are in no way involved with M&S, Aldi or any caterpillars at all for that matter. #TeamCuthbert

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